Peek On My Closet

Last Friday I planned to book for a hotel reservation as a post birthday gift for myself. After office, I ran to Go Hotels to check in for an overnight stay. It’s a “loser” move because I’m all alone but who cares. No biggie.

Anyways,  just a quick review of the hotel. Their service is mainly for accommodation. They don’t have a pool, or a bar that any hotels have. They have rooms with and without windows that according to my colleague is not good. Well for me that’s fine as long as it’s clean and cozy. One thing that strike me is the “no smoking” policy. Well as you all know I’m a habitual smoker. Eating is also prohibited so you are obliged to eat outside.

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When you yell out of me I feel disrespected and so ashamed that I just want to runaway and disappear. I’m a woman who understands a single sentence. You don’t have to repeat and shout over and over. You disgraced me in front of other people and most especially to my family. I know I owe you an apology because I caused your lunacy but you also owe me one when you have treated me that way.

I don’t deserve to be insulted and every time you’re one hell of a mad guy you seem to hurt me through and through. FYI: It’s countless already. Are you not aware that you have been very rude to me? Huh…

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my evil thoughts are killing me night after night..lots of suspicious accusations behind my back..lots of grey feelings..forcing my brain to draw beautiful and happy images makes me feel at ease whenever i feel this effin paranoia..getting nuts sometimes makes me realize i’m only human…and so as my partner….damn!

WTF I feel so incompetent today. Two escalations in a row are not good. I know I shouldn’t get bothered but I can’t help it. I feel so dumb and worthless to be part of this team. I’m trying hard (well doing the best I can) to fit in. But there are times that I get slipped. I’m only human (in tagalong, TAO lang ako). I’m not perfect and I do fail (rarely) and even softwares or systems also have bugs. Nothing and no one is perfect. People can sometimes be vulnerable to mistakes it’s just that it depends on what we can learn out of it. It’s just a bad day…. Ugghhhh…

Some people are unconscious on the torment and contentment of life. They seemed to be tranquil and forgot to sober the realities. Constantly keep on the safe side that they don’t even try to defy themselves into something new. Are you one of them? Hmmm well, If reality bites you pieces by pieces you would realize that you need to get out of your shelf and keen to take the risks to be able to challenge yourself if how far can you go. In other words you have to move out from your comfort zone.

Taking risks and facing the vindictive reality can be the worse regrets of your life. But what if you’re wrong? What if these things will make you a better person? And what if you fail? Well there’s always second chances. Trying new things is not bad at all. Isn’t it? I know there is danger but once you understand and love what you are doing it’s worth a try. Trust me. Been there; done that.

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I don’t like shoes..and I don’t like taking photos of them and my legs.haha

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Mom and I are in the jeepney heading somewhere and out of the blue you came in with the girl and she sit right next to you. She’s slimmer than I am, she’s prettier? (nah I don’t think so), she had this gesture that I usually do whenever we are together and you were so sweet and as if she is your girlfriend…then out of the blue you said you had to break up with me because you found somebody else….I cried and cried until I feel the excruciating feeling that entail to kill me… then there after my alarm rang and I realize that it’s the worst nightmare so far. Face is wet out of tears and my heart beats slower than the usual. It scares the hell out of me. This is the second time that I dreamt of you on someone’s arms. Does this mean something? Or I’m just being paranoid. Such a weird dream

Boyfie decided to spoil mama for awhile so last Holy Week (April 21 – 23, 2011) mom, boyfie and I together with Mary Rose (my cousin) and Jay ar (boyfie’s cousin) have gone to Baguio for a vacation. It’s quite stressful because of the long trip but we managed to enjoy and make ourselves comfortable with the weather (which is good by the way). We went (again) to Burnham Park, then to Strawberry Farm, The Mansion, Mines View Park, Camp John Hay, and Good Shepherd Convent.

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Two weeks ago I had a free trial session at Curves (Serendra, BGC). At first I’m hesitant to try it out because of the fear that I might not like it. After reading some reviews and info on their website I find it interesting because it’s kinda different to some of the workouts I have tried out. The machines are placed in a circular pattern and in between those machines they have a square mat. The purpose is mainly to workout with the machine and cools down in the mat.

Another alluring thing about Curves is that they have Zumba classes. It’s a mix of Zumba and the regular Curves Circuit workout. So what is Zumba? It’s a dance actually. Mix of Latin, Samba, Cha-cha, etc,. Smokin hot huh!

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